It's academic crunch time for me. So of course, I am surfing the web. On facebook, I stumbled across a link that someone had posted called "How not to talk to a survivor of campus sexual assault." Which was obviously looks far more interesting sounding than my 25 page paper or my job application.
The post I am referencing is credible, as it has a video within it of the actual incident being recalled. It concerns, as many stories have recently, Gail Hanson and her refusal to submit an application for a $300,000 grant to help prevent sexual assault on AU's campus. This incident in the article occurred when a girl from AU related to Mrs. Hanson how she herself was sexually assaulted on campus, and asked Mrs. Hanson to say something to all the individuals who will be sexually assaulted between now and the time next fall when the university will reconsider the application. Mrs. Hanson's response was to inform the girl that her story was "based in emotion" and that she was seeking "applause."
Now, this whole VAWA grant scandal occurred shortly after my last blog post, in which I related the story of how I was raped on campus last year. I debated a long time after I finished writing that post about whether I should actually publish it or not, but I did, and told myself that was the end of it. I decided I wasn't going to talk about sexual assault and rape anymore.
But this is too much. When Gail Hanson decided that mandatory education on sexual assault was too much work, I was furious, but didn't say much, because I didn't have the energy to keep talking sexual assault and rape. When student protests to convince her to change her mind and submit the application did not change her mind, I again did not say much because I was too uncomfortable talking about the subject. But now I have to say something. So listen up, Gail Hanson and everyone else who thinks that talking to someone in that manner is appropriate:
I have had enough. Even when I wrote last time about the attitudes I had faced after my experience with rape, I did not imagine a response like yours. Talking about how she was assaulted is "too emotional?" Excuse me? Is crying at a funeral too emotional then? What you don't seem to realize is that there is no such thing as being too emotional about sexual assault and rape. What you don't seem to realize is that when you have your very autonomy stolen from you, there is no such thing as forgetting. What you don't seem to realize is that you are speaking to a human being, who suffered an incomprehensible grievance.You seem to think that emotion shouldn't play a role in the discourse over actions that alter people's entire lives. So this student is looking for "applause?" Do you even know what the hell you are talking about? NO survivor of sexual assault is looking for applause. Survivors of sexual assault are looking for closure, they are looking for support, they are looking for healing. They aren't searching for a celebration of what happened to them. But yeah, Gail Hanson, I do applaud this student, because she was brave enough to stand up to someone as rude and condescending as you and talk about what she experienced. She was willing to hold you accountable for your decisions, which is clearly something that you yourself are not willing to do.
Your lack of empathy, compassion, and basic human decency astounds and disgusts me. Between now and the next application cycle for this grant, more people will be sexually assaulted and raped on this campus. Will it be Gail Hanson's fault? Of course not. But she is responsible for the fact that she did absolutely nothing to try to stop it. With that in mind, I make one basic plea to our university community as a whole. If no one else is going to try to stop sexual assault on this campus, we must do so ourselves. We all know what dangerous situations look like. It takes a lot of bravery to stand up and stop them, but I promise you that if you do so, you can change someone's life for the better. We can all be a part of making this community a better, safer place for everybody, but in order to do so we have to look out for one another. And next year, when it comes time for the next application cycle to begin, let's tell Gail Hanson that we will not take no for an answer.
Here is the link to the article and video I mentioned: http://www.tbd.com/blogs/amanda-hess/2011/04/how-not-to-talk-to-a-survivor-of-campus-sexual-assault-10028.html
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